Homeschool Diligence: part 2 of 3 Diligence versus Laziness

First read the article entitled “Diagnosing Laziness”.  After you've lovingly decided it is laziness that is keeping your child from doing their work, then read on.

What is an environment that will provide for the laziness to retreat while diligence takes its place?  Or in other words – what am I supposed to do about it?

This is a sticky area of parenting.  A little yelling and a certain amount of anger are reasonable responses to someone you are spending your life’s blood, effort and money on who doesn't appreciate it at all.  How dare they act like children!  Yet, children they are and parents we are, so we have to do something.  Yelling doesn't work for long.  Anger only expends the limited energy we have left after teaching school and doing the laundry.

There are two underlying principles at work in these answers.  The first is that a habit must be replaced by something rather than just eliminated.  In the void of obtaining a virtue, vice will creep back in, so laziness must be replaced by diligence.  What is an environment that will promote diligence?  Obedience is joy.  Compliment your children when they show even a small amount of diligence.  Praise them and cuddle them.  Reward them with a quick tickling.  Be proud of their effort.  Tell them how proud you are of them.  They just overcame themselves to please you.

The second underlying principle is the same motto that my husband and I have in this and many other areas of child training : make disobedience more painful than obedience.  Obedience is joy.  Disobedience is painful.

Specifically, these are tactics we use to wage war against our children’s baser instincts.  I must insert that we are NOT waging war against our children.  Our greatest desire is to love, nurture and provide for our children.  These small (or large) battles should never usurp that primary objective to love, nurture and provide for our children.  The challenge looms large, but is achievable.  These tactics of battle are to be executed with tenderness and caring, not with anger, as much as is in our power to do so.

Rules of Engagement – You are the parent.  Your mission is to be the parent in this battle.  Anyone who is not the parent, can not take or maintain the authority of the parent. They do not have the wisdom or loving discipline to effectively handle the authority.  Hostile take-over or pilfering of authority away from the parent will not be tolerated.  You are the parent.

To read the application of these principles read the third article entitled,  Battle for Diligence.